DEFINING MYSELF




(Discovering my shameless path

Part 2)

“I told myself that I was going to work my butt off and do whatever I could to make myself better because in my mind, the best way that I could get back at all those people who made fun of me, teased me, called me ugly and called me a monster was to make myself better and to show them – you know what, tell me those negative things and I’m going to turn them around and use them as a ladder to climb up to my goals- and that’s what I did!”  Lizzie Velasquez (Motivational speaker, author and all round Super Woman).

There’s really nothing as challenging, mind burgling or triggering as watching a woman who was labelled the ugliest woman alive and was told to do the world a favour by killing herself give an inspirational speech about how beautiful and amazing it is to be her and talk about the benefits of her rare health condition and failing eyesight knowing perfectly well that her face and body constantly get criticized and verbally abused by the average human being. “There truly is gold everywhere but we are often too blind to see it”, I thought while I watched Lizzie Velasquez speak.

The ability to define yourself as something or someone and stick to this definition no matter what society tells you is simply amazing and on this blog post and consequent ones on the topic “DISCOVERING MY SHAMELESS PATH” I will be sharing with you some life changing tips on discovering yourself and truly defining your path because you can’t successfully start a journey without first knowing your destination.

I have been soul searching a lot lately; trying to find myself, my style, my interests, my social and religious opinions and most importantly, trying to figure out my purpose and how to use my gifts and abilities to positively influence the society at large. The good book says, “anyone who seeks shall find”, hence the universe has decided to work in my favour and is constantly revealing these things to me and helping me build a powerful mental portfolio that I believe will be the bedrock of my success in life.



The human “mind of self” can be likened to an upside down triangle lol, it’s funny how powerful our minds are and how the laws that govern the earth have been designed to help those who can will their minds towards something and believe it into existence. Most religions refer to this God given ability as FAITH. 




Figure 1: triangle of the human mind of self



(DISCLAIMER- DEFINING YOURSELF CAN NOT AND WILL NOT BE A SPLIT SECOND REALIZATION AND YES YOU MAY CONCLUDE ON SOMETHING AND REALIZE TOMORROW THAT YOUR PERCEPTION OF SELF IS INFLUENCED BY OTHER PEOPLE’S OPINIONS AND OTHER FACTORS INCLUDING RELIGIOUS BELIEFS, EDUCATIONAL AND SOCIETAL STANDARDS.) 

Defining yourself may take a while, you will have to answer some really confusing questions like “who am I?”, “why was I created human and not a goat or a butterfly?”, “why was I created?”, “why this gender?”, “how much time do I have left?” “what’s my purpose in life?” “Am I supposed to be where I am right now?” The more you think about it, the more you start to pay close attention to yourself and notice little details that you thought didn’t matter or you tried to hide because those features don’t conform to society’s short sighted standards or because the industry you aspire to break into rejects those features. It’s not a day’s journey but just like every journey, it starts with a step.

I have chosen to take this step today by being grateful and focusing on the things that I do have and making those the things that define me. I have defined myself to the best of my abilities in this way…



…Benahili Faith Ojeme is a peacock, a shamelessly flamboyant peacock that was born into an African home and will rise to an unattained level of greatness that no man on earth will ever be able to surpass, she will conquer societal standards and lead an army of young individuals that will influence great change in the world at large; Benahili will never settle for less because she understands that she and only she is the CAPTAIN OF HER SHIP AND MASTER OF HER FAITH.

So now my question for you is, WHO ARE YOU? (TAKE YOUR TIME TO FIGURE THIS OUT AND WRITE IT DOWN IF POSSIBLE).

When you finally define your path, you can begin your journey and always remember,

BRAVE STARTS HERE.



Thanks for reading, please comment your opinions and suggestions and I’ll be sure to get back to you if need be.




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